Nggak Enak is Uneasy

Monday. Heavy traffic!
But still, woke up at eight, grabbed some toasts with chocolate jam, and got a shower.
Pretty quick. Only took half an hour. So, I went off at 8.30.
Waiting for Bus number 52, Bekasi-Tanah Abang, lewat Komdak, Thamrin.
So I waited.
…though some busses numbered 05 passed by…
I could have been gotten in. But, ah, they’re too crowded.
So I waited
…convined by the less crowded space I’ll get, the pretty cozy seat, and air con…
I could wait, like forever, I thought.
Then a woman dressed in light yellow suit came near.
“Lama ya, Mbak. Nunggu nomor berapa?”, then I told her, number 52.
After one hour had passed…
05 passed in front of me. Slow in pace. Like teasing. No crowd, no people stood, many empty seats.
Hmm…could have gotten in. I could continue my journey with bus number 66 after get out from number 05.
But I did not jump into that white bus. Simply because I felt nggak enak to this young lady, si emba-emba, who started conversations with me.
Uh!
Finally, I got there, Jl. Rasuna Said, at 11.30, by 05 that passed by afterward, stood all the way, took 66. Precisely the same thing I could have done one or two hours before.
Once I stepped into the room, everyone had gone to meetings.
And I felt
unguilty.