aku punya teman.
nama bekennya ada ranum-ranumnya gitu, deh.
trus belakangnya bee-bo, hehehe... pasti tau dong. (lokal, buat sastra Inggris UI). Tapi, ini ga ada hubungannya, sih.

Point is, I wanna be ripe.
In experience, in focus in life.
I think, it is so easy to find inspiring, ripe people.
When you see the lecturers in the department,
when I see them,
I know, I stll have lots to dig in in this world.

Ov, come on, Consolate yourself!

Feeling exhausted, it is official, Midtest is not all around anymore, but

* I lost my lovely agenda, which its each page I made on my own! plus... all notes about my final essay is all there. So, please... if you found a colorful agenda with the cover "Samuel Barber's Piano Concerto" at front and "Classic meets Cuba at the back", It belongs to me.

* Applying for a visa is not as easy as I imagined, plus... the bird flu issue plus Bali bombing II, make it harder. (lucky damn all first world citizen, for your accessibleness for visa on arrival).

* The thought of what I read in Sejarah Kebudayaan Indonesia materials for midtest is just too much to endure. Names of Buddha's hand gestures, their meanings, years and years passed by Pithecanthropus erectus, meganthropus, and fellows. Despite the real questions in midtest, which appeared to be EXACTLY THE SAME AS LAST YEAR'S.

*I couldn't speak fluently on basic conversation in Spanish! Moncho must had been dying to send me again to Bahasa Spanyol Sumber. I am so not typical of student in Bahasa Spanyol Sumber Lanjutan. Well, the typical ? ya, actually, the class is only joined by two legal interested students: me and Indah. Indah did spend her last summer in Spain. So, you can tell... I'm so ashamed of myself. Hope my smiles work.

* I have to search and find corpuses: articles, interviews, anything... for my final essay, about contemporary new age religions in US. can you help? :)

* I really dying without my agenda. It's pretty lovely, so I don't doubt the possibility that someone had seen it fell out of my stupid blue leathered bag and just took it. It consists of: two unique postcards, which I covered with sticky transparent plastic, Rp. 6.000. Plus, one pack of colorful papers in spotlight green, yellow, blue, orange, and pink, Rp. 20.000,00. Plus, a white binder, Rp. 10.000 for the process. Most importantly, my schedule for the next two weeks and my period calendar!

one consolation for tonite: Toni Morisson's "Love"
consolation for weekend: my lovely brother's birthday: Mossa is turning ten. Plus, his concert at Kelapa Gading. Won't miss the show, lil' bro!

Hail to writers. To those who abundantly ornate the ordinary into an extra. Feel lucky, hey, those people whose names are written. Whose forms inspire the senses of right people. Right people, those who will documented these standard thus becomes an embroided stitch in history.

*sigh* you guys, bloggers. Damn lucky those people whose body and soul alter into phrases. Though they might look good, actually the quality is in the tellers. Not in the object.

-a comment, after seeing abundant words of joy, tears, and confusions from my fellow bloggers...err... writers-

a midnite chat

Someone came and slept over at my room, asked, “Whom is you lean on?”, I replied, “God.” Then, unsatisfied question,” Oh, come on, you must have someone whose shoulders you put on when you need. Someone stronger and can cloak your world with breezy and relaxing atmosphere!”

Then, I described this in my head. On a circle plate, there I stand. Between me and other people, there is a ravine . It is God. Full with mixed consciousness, I say, whatever gender it is has a strength to control the balance of wind, thus I can stand steadily.

Afterward, I finished the answer by putting families near to my circle plate.

“And men?”

“I can take them as a complimentary. As a part of me. (Property, is that the word?) Not something haloing my plate.”

“Ah, I’m beginning to trust you…I can picture you doing that.”

“Good then,” said me.

Ode untuk Hati yang Terpatah

Untuk teman-temanku, yang baru mencoba merajut kembali tangganya, walau tangga itu penuh duri.
Aku sangat mengerti.

Seorang pelukis menggambarkan tangga untukmu
Ia membuatnya begitu rapi
begiti tersususn, periodik, teratur, hingga kau terbiasa...
Duniamu pun bagaikan imaji
Kauagungkannya dengan bingkai, kaupajang di ruang paling terang
Bahkan kaupun masuk ke dalamnya.
Lihat,
kamu, dengan senyum bahagia, bangga menantang dunia
Karena kamu punya tangga
yang akan menjagamu dari kejatuhan
akan membisikkan alunan sejuk saat kaumengaduh
yang menginspirasikanmu untuk berbuat yang terbaik
bukan demi nilai
demi dia
Namun,
saat tangga dihapus,
kau seperti lukisan bodoh di sana
semua orang yang menggunjingkanmu
semua yang menikmati ceritamu
semua penggosip di Kansas
Semua teman menceramahimu dengan ajaran POSA , KUKSA, atau Musholla
Bahkan sang pelukis
menganggapmu
bodoh.
Pathethic!
Aku mengerti itu,
bukan salahmu terpana pada lukisanmu sendiri
Menangislah.
Jadilah saksi untuk semua penikmat
bahwa dalam dunia sureal itu,
kaulah yang paling logis.
Saat mereka ingin menarikmu kembali,
hanya peri waktu yang dapat membuat bingkai itu lebih kecil
hingga dapat berpindah tempat.
Tidak lagi mengkotakkimu.
Tapi dapat kaujinjing,
kausimpan,
kaukunci di ruang berdebu,
kaujual,
atau bahkan
kaubuang.